Playing Your Way To Happiness
"Has your doctor ever given you a prescription to paint?"
By Amy Salman
Growing up as a child, it felt like the arts were my whole life. I was dancing daily and playing guitar, and also loved writing music and poetry. I just couldn’t get enough of being creative.
But after my mother passed when I was 10 years old, I slowly started to lose interest in those things that had given me so much joy. My mom was my dance instructor and was training me to dance professionally, so it was incredibly hard for me to continue without her support. She was my cheerleader in everything in life.
As I got older, I always noticed that there was a feeling of emptiness in my soul. Yes, I was terribly sad about my mom, but there was this other thing that was missing. I eventually realized it was my love of dance and music that was absent.
As I made my way into the working world and even had successes in a series of corporate jobs, I still never felt complete. I often thought about taking a ballet class, but it was too painful for me. I tried to pick my guitar back up, but I could feel myself being too critical of the teacher. And writing just wasn’t the same for me as it had been in my youth. I still felt a void. I felt stuck.
When I was finally able to work out a lot of my childhood pain, I began to write again and welcomed the arts back into my life in a different way. Although a ballet class is something I would love to do now, I must confess that my ego, injuries, and yes, even the memories, still might just be too painful.
But today, I find more than enough joy being a spectator of music and dance — and being a participant in yoga, writing, even bathing in nature. They all bring me peace and happiness. And, if my injuries allow, martial arts is on my bucket list. Stay tuned!
Though you can see that my own special thing is the arts — we all have specific interests that bring us joy and fulfillment. There’s even a term for it: “adult play.” And it’s as simple as it sounds: Engaging in fun, often unstructured activities that bring joy and a sense of childlike wonder. It can include things like playing games, doing creative hobbies, spending time outdoors, or simply being playful with friends and family. And it’s an often overlooked part of our overall health and well-being.
As children, we spend most of our time playing, getting curious and being creative. But something happens when we start “adulting.” A lot of that fun tends to fall by the wayside. In the midst of our busy lives, whether it’s work, raising a family, or other responsibilities, we simply forget to play. And, in the absence of this playtime, people can often find themselves feeling down or depressed. While many folks can’t quite connect the dots as to why, the lack of joy and fulfillment in one’s life can take an actual toll on their health.
The benefits of adult play are plentiful. It can significantly contribute to happiness by reducing stress, boosting creativity, strengthening social connections, and improving overall well-being.
Sounds pretty good, right? Better than a synthetic solution? Who wouldn’t want a prescription to play??
Earlier this year, a client came to me who was dealing with severe anger and depression. He was on several medications to manage both conditions, and he wanted to ween off of them. After an in-depth consultation, one of my first recommendations was that he start painting. This was a prior passion of his that he was not actively engaged in. Each night, I asked him to retreat to a quiet room, by himself, and paint. After three months, he was off his medications, had mended his broken relationships, and his anger had subsided. Painting, as part of his wellness program, was a major factor in his healing.
To be clear, I’m not saying that adult play is a silver bullet that will solve everyone’s problems in the very same fashion. As I mentioned, I had to work on myself before I could really derive the full effects of engaging in my long lost passions. But now that you know the full up-side, isn’t it worth a try?
Play doesn’t have to be complicated or even time-consuming. Just think back to when you were a kid or to a time where you even felt like a kid: What were some of the activities that you really loved? Might it not be fun to get back into it — or try something that you’ve always wanted to do?
It’s win-win. Or no-lose. I get them confused. But the bottom line is that the likely byproduct is a happier and healthier you.
AMY SALMAN is a Holistic Nutritionist, Wellness & Recovery Coach and Founder of The Wellness Map. She is also a coach and board advisor for the Lean In mentoring program.
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